inspiration

I have the picture below posted on my mirror in my bedroom. It's a reminder of what I once looked like and it's my motivation to finally lose this weight. It's a self portrait I took in college.



Is it unreasonable to think I can get back to this weight? And those arms, jeez, I want those arms back!

I was thin for the first 21 years of my life. Under all of this weight is a thin, athletic person screaming to get out. I want to be the way I was. It's all I ever knew. Even though I've been overweight for the past 10 years it's not me, it's not who I am. I will never be happy being this weight.

Growing up, aside from normal activities I was either playing softball, tennis, throwing the javelin or discus. I can't even explain how it feels to still be that same athletic person inside but not on the outside. I realize it's my own fault for letting it happen and not changing it sooner but it's so much harder to lose the weight than it is to gain it.

It kind of all fell apart after I graduated college. I met David and we spent all of our time together. I didn't have a job out of college and I think that's when I started to run to food for comfort. I lived with 2 guys. There wasn't much cooking going on in that house! And I didn't get that bug to want to cook yet so we ate fast food...a lot of fast food. That was kind of the beginning of my downfall. Kind of the beginning for David as well.

We gained this weight together and now we are going to lose it together. I just get mad at myself from time to time for letting this happen. The girl in the mirror is not the one I see when I close my eyes. The girl above is.